Score: 7.5 out of 9 Firstly, few some jobs occupations like Policemen and Sportsmen (these are not jobs. No. IELTS Essay Correction: Set Retirement Age For Everybody. Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.6 0.12 With growing age, (need a comma with an introducer.) Replace it with something that adds value. A recent study showed that people who work in physically and mentally demanding occupations might suffer from dementia if they continue working in the same occupation after turning fifty. You’re not discussing it. I think it’s it is time for us to ask ourselves and (ask ourselves what? be the same for everyone or should it be basis based on different occupations. IELTS Essay Evaluation: Give Money To Creative People. They believe that certain workers deserve to retire and receive a pension at an earlier age. It should refer to individuals.

Some people think that having a set retirement (e.g.65 years) for everybody, regardless of occupation, is unfair. By Sartaj Singh on July 18, 2019 • ( Leave a comment) Some people think that having a set retirement age (e.g. Different countries follow different policies when it comes to employment. That’s the question. IELTS Essay Correction: Fixed Age For Retirement. of Spelling Errors: 0 2 Jobs can’t have core competencies.) Having said that, does the retirement age of 65 acceptable? (Who is we? They want to read your original writing. In my opinion, (= I feel. that of police and a medical officer (engineer, doctor, accountant, ….) Not someone else’s that you’ve crammed. They believe that certain workers deserve to retire and receive a pension at an earlier age. There are also certain jobs that are better suited for youngsters than seniors. IELTS Essay Evaluation: Music Vs Science in Schools. Your email address will not be published. ‘Today’ does not mean anything.) This will count as repetition and will reduce the LR score.) No. Subscribe as testbig VIP readers and get unlimited access to essays on the top list. Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace stands with stand. Don’t write it.) Such jobs are suited for young people. Avg. 65 years) for everybody, regardless of occupation, is unfair. Right? When that women she (use a pronoun to refer back to a noun) cried for help, (need a comma here: When X, Y.) I would like to draw your attention to (No need to write this. That’s the question. therefore by have a retirement age of 65, the company loses their trainers. I agree with that view. ( Log Out /  require physical strength, agility and attention span as their (Who does their refer to? Hence, it advisable to reduce their retirement age and provide them early pension so that they can sustain themselves. Sentence Length: 19.133 21.0 I will support my opinion by giving reasons in the below paragraphs.